CORNWALLMC's profile

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AGE: 36
LAST LOGIN: May 14

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Poetry / Bad Place
Version 1
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Bad Place Rotten, erased beauty, and replaced love, and diseased walls, they bleed. Terror, I have you, and cutting touch, and acid confrontation, it bites. Prison, time stops, and wish for freedom, and wish for release, no key. Lonely, dark rooms, and those noises, and created entities, my friends. Cold, ice fingered, and the slow air, and the stillness, no warning.
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Poetry / In The Mirror
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
In The Mirror Lately, I have had ill will, and being of that sense, have crushed the spirit. I know it is, irregular, but it is holding me, like a need. And what I see, distorted, morphed madness, is a right reality. Capture, my throat and squeeze, and tell me, no positive affirmation. Jerking into conscious, space, an empty void, of confused. I want this, beauty, so that I may smile, in the mirror.
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Poetry / Eclipse
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
Eclipse Slip five to butch, nod Vanessa Mae signed, turn see exotic queue of retro rejects, with slap conversation clipped with whining. Man who is wolf opens door, speaks foreign, smelling sweet fog as music pours in, watching arms flaying in neonic routine. Sea of cliched leather, denim with PVC friend, bottles filled with coloured piss drink, negoiate journey through awkward mass. Fake salutation for physical potential, eyes meet, drinking Jack as ignored in same breath, tune from forgotte...
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Poetry / Fishing Cove
Version 1
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Fishing Cove Secret path of little frequent, bordered glorious yellow flare and thorn, turning corner with majestic wall of rock, and heavenly stance look down on Fishing Cove. Slowly negotiate winding peril, watching for moment to cascade the drop, descending into this natural bounty, and walk and golden fine on Fishing Cove. Bronzed and battered with weathered fine, mixing with alternative naked youth, finding place on neutral expanse, and claim days victory on Fishing Cove. Sun rains down ...
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Poetry / Bed
Version 1
4 Reviews   2 Comments
Bed Fussing, cussing as hands guide this disaster zone. Barking still orders with medicine fragrance. The nurse places me like a mourning relative, and gaze my eyes to the dirty ceiling. Fussing, cussing as unknown journey begins through, virginal corridors and aware of presence. The nurse jokes like an old friend, and gaze my eyes to the dirty ceiling. Fussing, cussing as reports are presented, in monotone with clipped efficiency. The nurse wanders away laughing, and gaze my eyes to the dirt...
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Reviews
Have you noticed that when you read this poem (and maybe it was just the way I read it-the pain killers for my broken neck are really kicking in right now!) that it sounds like a train on a track. No kidding. The beat or pace if you will sound similar to that of a rail steam engine. It made reading it very easy. Anyway I loved the imagery and simplicity of this piece. All to often a lot of poems seem to drown in their own words but your word quota seems just right and the ending made me smile...
Short Story / Sixty Six
Love it. Struck a chord with me remembering those moments where you literally ceate the most amazing scenarios in the most normal of everyday situations. You imagine yourself to be this "god" of power, physically and mentally with this slight sense of indifference and yet when you get to the point of first contact you freeze, the spell is broken and you collapse in the reality check! Great ending with the monotone exchange of words. Wouldn't it be great to read people's minds!?
Non-fiction / The Gates
Locked
Very difficult subject matter. What really comes across is the detachment factor in this work, the "do what you will I don't care" sense that sometimes is used as a defense mechanism against such a horrific experience. You have conveyed that and the anger aspect well, the tension between denial and reality. I'd love to know what style/feel music you would have with this. Always one for contrast these words softly spoken/song would have a devastating effect.
Wow! Was thinking how angry you sound in these lyrics! I can just imagine some intense band thrashing away at their instruments whilst the lead singer is screaming the words down the microphone! I also liked how the first verse comes across as softly softly approach (with some venom of course) which then might lead to a very loudly played chorus. It is always important I think to have contrast in any art piece and thought it came across that way. Great stuff!
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